Tales from New Jersey..

And there he came towards me, ruffled hair,stained tee,bloodshot eyes (from not sleeping,I guessed),empty bottle in hand and staggering. I sat on the couch,watching him totter towards me and I wondered if I should get up to help. But I sat stil,watching. He looked around, trying to make some sense of it all. Then suddenly he lunged foward. And in the attempt, fell flat on his face. I stood up, unsure of what to do and what he would do. And then, in the coolest way possible, he steadied his head,looked up and smiled at me. The warmest smile I`ve seen in years. The kinds that made his eyes shine long after the smile had left his face. Then he steadied himself on his feet and walked towards me, arms open wide, rickety steps and that smile intact. And I thought to myself, " This is why people have babies.."



Hello People,

Those of you who`ve read my earlier posts, know that right now I`m at my sister`s place in New Jersey. Its a family reunion, with my folks down from India. And I`m having the time of my life! :-))

Shall try and give some interesting updates on Lil Ishaan, as soon as I find some time. Till then, God Bless!

Edited to add... (A Gal`s gotta do..)

A well-meaning Someone , who learnt about my 'Girl`s' night out yesterday,commented with much- felt sympathy about how sad it must be to try and have fun alone! A similar thought had crossed my mind as well. Layers of self-pity and indignance towards The G, coated my very being,since the moment I made up my mind to go out on my own. How sad it must feel, thought I, to be sitting in a theatre full of people, alone and watching a movie that celebrates lasting friendships.
Turns out : Not Quite! :-)
And for the next two weeks (until The G`s deadlines get over), this is what I shall do. Celebrate life and the essence of my being.

To quote Carrie..

"The most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you, you love, well, that's just fabulous. "

I`m lucky I`ve found that someone.
But hey, does that mean he has to tag along, everywhere I go? ;-)

A Gal`s gotta do..

what She`s gotta do... :-)

And so there we were, the three of us as planned, being jostled along in a bus, enroute to the Rosedale Mall one July afternoon. The bright afternoon sun shone down on us, as we skipped along.Happy to be out having fun. It seemed like ages really. It was! What with The G`s super hectic schedule and endless paper deadlines, life had really come to a dead-end. Until now. Today was our day. Today we were going to have some fun, just the three of us.

First stop at The Mall, where I went completely beserk! A lil over the top,I guess, buying kiddie stuff for lil Ishaan. Until a phone call from The G brought me to my senses! He was calling to find out how things were going! Anyway, so after the shopping spree, there was just enough time to grab a quick drink ( at Caribou Cofee! What did ya think?;-) ), before we had to sprint across the length of the mall to the theatre for the movie.

Yup, The Movie of the year that I had been meaning to watch since eternity now.

I know, I know - everyone and their brother has given a rundown on the movie and picked apart everything from the fashion to the shoes to the wall color and the brand of sheets on Charlotte's bed.
Whatever.
I'm late. Carrie fans come, bash me up!
So anyway, Rather than do a big overview and an autopsy of all the nuances, this is more of a list (albeit a verry long one! ) of impressions and the stream of conscious thoughts that went through my head while I watched the movie. Some of which I was texting the hubby at work as it went on. Generally I thought it was very good although the banter seemed a bit forced compared to the show. But I expected that due to the change is format.

Sure, the show always thrived on salacious dialogues and jaw-dropping haute couture, but there was always a core that was about people and their relationships. The real insight was that you could use the show’s gimmick to really dig into some serious issues like committment, fidelity, sexual identity, family, class issues, and women’s careers.

Ok, I admit the movie is tamer and less gutsy than Sex and the City (SATC) soap episodes. The movie is about girlish vanity and their ongoing search for the perfect man in their lives. Yet it was great fun to watch. There were moments we were in splits.

The only obvious difference between SATC episodes and movie is that the men are no longer easily “disposable” and girls are no longer polygamous. Yet there is much to watch out for: love, hurt, friendship, labels, infidelity and fidelity (yes), fears, loneliness and emotions. All in all, very watchable and laughable.

Anyway, so here`s my two cents :

1. Why the hell are they using a silly Fergie song as the movie opener? Yuck!

2. Labels and Love?? I`ve heard of people moving to a different place to be with someone they love (yours truly!) or to be away from the people they love. But whoever moves to a new city IN SEARCH OF love?? And really, does NYC have better prospects ??

3. That Smith Jared turned into quite a man, didn't he?

4. OMG! What the heck happened to Candice Bergen? I'm not trying to be mean here but she's swelled.

5. I have to admit it. Carrie looked amazing in the Vogue shoot

6. Favorite outfit - the Proenza Schouler outfit she wears to the library. Especially those shoes. Darn! Plus, that library is gorgeous.

7. Saying "Let's just get it over with" during sex?? OUCH!

8. I know it's not really a Disney coloring book but it sure looks like it.

9. The Closet - WOW! Not that I would want that exact one, but the dream of so much space... sigh!

10.The whole Carrie wedding thing was well done (but I have to say, she looked a state with a dead bird on her head and very stark red lips/black eye make up) - but it was too predictable. As soon as the dress arrived, I knew it would end in tears. Admit it people, we all had our doubts about Big, didn’t we??

11. Whoever packs boxes wearing those kinda clothes?!

12. You'd think the gang would be used to seeing Samantha by the 5th "homecoming". Geez.

. Okay, yeah, I'd squeal for the 2nd bottle of Champagne.

13. What`s with Charlotte`s squeals all through the first half?? Almost to ‘Utpal Dutt-ish” proportions!! Did she always do that in the t.v episodes? Cant seem to remember!

14.. Just loved how Samantha shuts down Karl the d**khead at the rehearsal dinner. Loved it! But I'm not so sure about Big`s reaction. Seemed so out of character for him, to silently bear the jerk`s totally unacceptable comments.

.15. Carrie’s really over-the-top reaction to Big’s momentary lapse ,pre-altar(which is pbly understandable). There were many ways she could have gone when Big caught up with them in the street - it wasn’t necessary that she had to go to pieces with all of the high drama. It would have been just as - heck, more - believable if she’d whipped that stupid bird out of her hair, told the girls to go back to the church and have a great time at the reception, run off to city hall with Big and then off to Mexico. No humiliation, no drama, just a happy spur of the moment elopement. But then the movie would have suddenly happily ended, except for finishing up the other stories. No, No - dont for a moment think I`m on Big`s side. Just that Carrie`s exit from that scene could have been with a wee bit more self-respect. That`s all.

16. Best act of the movie - Charlotte's face as she yells "NO!" at Big. It was spot on. Worth it to see the movie again just for that moment.

17. Did anyone notice that Carrie's phone is all taped up? She's not a technology girl. So she doesn't spend her money there. Nice detail.

18. If Louise is so broke how can she even afford a rental ‘label’ bag? It's still expensive. And the whole thing with her and the "labeled" bags just kind of creeped me out. Plus, I can't see Carrie ever caring about that kinda service. I don't think she would be down with the whole borrow and return thing. It's like pretending you own something. I don't like it.

19. I could so relate to Charlotte's fear about having so many good things happen and being terrified that something terrible was going to happen. Who doesn't feel that sometimes?

20. Dang it! Yes, I sniffed a bit during the New Year's Eve scene.

21. No one who loves shoes that much would wear white kid leather booties to run out into the snow and sleet.

22. When Samantha tells Smith she wants to leave him I was surprised he wasn't more surprised. I would have expected him to think she wants to move back to NYC and not leave him.

23. I thought the whole scene with Samantha scarfing down food on the plane was a tad melodramatic. Doesn’t go with her character somehow!

24. In the show, Miranda was admittedly cynical and could be prickly at times. But she was also clever, funny, a loyal friend, and by the end of the show, a great mother and a wife. I like to think the real Miranda is off on an island somewhere with Steve and Brady, because the redhead I saw onscreen was a nasty, judgmental shrew. The movie opens with her constantly lambasting Steve, for no apparent reason; when he cheats (which is something that Steve would never do), she uses it as an excuse to excise him like an infected boil, never once considering his point of view or the effect their separation might have on their son. By the time she and Steve reunited at the end of the movie, I almost felt sorry for him. In fact I really did.

25. I hate the fact that the "Something Blue" Manolo Blahnik heels in the movie have a higher and skinnier heel than the ones they are selling now. I just know it! Oh yeah, and that's a heck of a price increase from $525 to $895 ( or $ 945 or whatever it is today).

(yeah yeah so I`ve kept a track! Doesn’t hurt – maybe some day I`ll have the dough!)

26. Stanford Blatch deserved some more screen time, instead of reducing him to a stereotype gay character,prancing about in the background.

27. Where on earth was Aidan? I kept thinking that Carrie would end up marrying Aidan(who would of course miraculously be divorced and single! And waiting for her at the altar!).Turns out, the script writers didnt have that particular brainwave! What a pity!

28. After wallowing away, self analyzing and resurrecting her previous self, Carrie’s resolution with Big was too quick, too easy and not a poetic finish (despite the poetry). I kind of wish they hadn’t married at all in the end - I think that would totally befit the character Carrie was projected to be,over all these years.

29. Carrie ends up blaming herself (and Miranda) for Big’s behavior and, of course, like the idiot she is, takes him back at the end. And THIS is supposed to be our happy ending! I couldn’t say I was surprised, but I was certainly horrified. Big treated Carrie with a complete lack of respect. Even during the show, he only wanted her when she was unavailable. Yet somehow, the fact that Carrie “snags” him is supposed to be a romantic, something for women to swoon over. To me, if Carrie would have finally conceded to the fact (and consciously at that) that she was in a co-dependent relationship or what she thought was in love with a toxic, selfish user, the result would have been a lot more palatable. As it is, the show killed anything remotely likeable or admirable about her.

30. The entire movie is a celebration of being a woman, the friendships that save us, the new friends that heal us, the joy of being in love with one`s self and the men we love, in spite of themselves.
So as I looked around the not-so-sold-out theater, I thought “here are independent women, going out to a late show with their girlfriends or alone, and being proud to be a woman.”

Sex and the City: The Movie gives women four beautiful, powerful role models who are confident of themselves and pass that confidence on to their audience. That’s empowerment - being proud of who you are and proud to be a woman.

And so, as we walked out of the theatre to the parking lot where The G was waiting for us, I couldn’t help smiling, as I thought to myself :

“We had a great time today, the three of us – I , me and myself…”

Girl`s Night Out..

Yup :-) The Chicago trip got postponed by a couple of days. And so I`m going to have a girl`s night out today,as per plan. I`m so thrilled! Its been ages and I really need it. So this is what the plan looks like. A trip to Rosedale Mall. Some shopping first. Then grab a drink and rush in for a movie. And then meet up with The G for a dinner date :-)

* Piper waltzes arnd the room! *

And guess what??
I deserve every moment of it! :-)

Details shall follow soon...

I Lost My Heart In San Francisco..

No! Not literally. But as I sit back listening to Tony Bennett`s rendition of this song, I cant help
thinking, "Well almost!

San Fran has joined my prized and coveted list of possible places to live.

It has a great vibe, a trendy, boho-hippy and a downright weird feel to it with wonderful eclectic laid-back stylish people. Architecture amazingly coordinated and brightly coloured houses facing onto clean streets. Every moment was like being on a movie set as you hike up hills (And no, we're not talking lovely rambling hills, but steep gradients, mothers of mountains!). Where the houses seem to be sliding down in sync with the rhythmic clanging of the cable cars as they tango downhill.

San Francisco where the squirrels have attitude. And where the homeless bums are polite. Whilst I mutter stock phrases like "No I don't have any change!" , they respond back with a guffaw, "Credit cards accepted. Not returned though." I smile and shuffle off wanting to scream, I'm jobless and ‘country-less’ too and you think you've got problems... good ol` over dramatic me! They've even managed to make Starbucks outlets look quaint. Talking of which I had my first Starbucks experience out of Minnesota and for the record it was a disgustingly weak coffee!The only sad part was that we didnt have sufficient time for the whole 'Frisco Experience' to slowly seep in. Here`s a brief account of our visit. Not a travelogue ofcourse.Because we did not spend enough time for that. But just a brief glimpse of the few hours that we spent in the city.

First Halt at the Market Plaza and Embarcadero

Amidst the two tallest buildings in the city – Spear and Steuart Tower, there happened to be a carnival of sorts happening that day(lucky us!). A spectacular multi-cultural celebration that showcased the very best of what it truly means to be a part of this city. A great tantalizing array of music, dance and artistry slowly parading through the Market Plaza, to the cheers of millions of city-ites who had gathered to participate in the celebration. One awesome experience! Not that I expected any less of the city named after a religious fanatic, who shed his clothes, talked to birds and recreated himself on the far edge of spiritual bliss!

Next halt at The Fisherman`s Wharf and The Golden Gate Bridge

San Francisco is a chemistry of moods and colours, a sparkling mirage of blue and white and gold kissed by the crisp breath of the Pacific. Magical spirits hover in the wind over the Pacific waters. The first glimpse of the iconic structure stretching across the Bay, its yawning expanse emerging out of mist and low clouds is truly fantastic…

We pounded the sidewalks (how American of us!) of this city for 3 hours and my feet and calves are definitely feeling it even now! The first couple of hours we spent,walking around the bay area towards the Golden Gate Bridge through Fisherman's Wharf and Ghirardelli Square, literally wading through the mass of humanity that congregates there for the first glimpse of The Bridge and The Alcatraz Islands. And quite unexpectedly, I did run into the very famous ‘BushMan’!

Took lots of mandatory ‘orkut-ish’ pictures everywhere.

(Not going into specific details about these places because one can google them online anytime.)

After that, The G and I hiked uphill all the way to Lombard Street, instead of following the other much more leveled route (thanks to The G`s expertise in map-reading! Hey wait a minute! Was that really ‘an honest mistake” as The G had claimed later, by way of explanation??!!). So Anyway, San Fran is built on 43 hills,the steepest being at 31.5degrees.....So much fun when you havent slept much, have been constantly on the move for the past 3 days, your backpack weighs 20million pounds and you dont know where youre going!! But I`m not complaining! The efforts were definitely well-worth it.

The first thing I noticed about San Francisco, as we ventured up, were the distinctive homes. The city is filled with two-storyed wooden houses, in what creates the impression of the early 1900's style, just back in fashion.. Such symmetry can create both a sense of idyllic neatness or a sort of dull loathing. I can't help but wonder if the famous San Francisco earthquake of the early 1900's had something to do with the current look. The second thing ofcourse was the mind-blowing view of the bay from the top of the hill. And the final reward was the sight of a million cars trying to manoeuvre the crookedest street in the world, at eight acute angles!That was all the time we had, to tour some parts of the city. But I havent quite had enough. One cant, no matter how long a stretch of time one spends here in the city.

And so, as I sit here listening to Tony Bennett croon 'I left my heart in San Francisco', I think to myself," Well, not quite. But as the Governor of California himself said, - I`ll be back..!"

I tried and tried to fit the pictures in the last blog along with captions and all - No Joy! This sure sucks man! :-((
Anyway, So these are a few pictures. Basically of the Alcatraz from The Fisherman`s Wharf, The various views of the city, Lombard street(the crookedest street in the world, as well the View of the Bay. Also a verry hazy picture of the Golden Gate. Enjoy! :-))

A Legend Passes Away..

India needs to wake up!

A Field Marshal, A war legend who scrpited the nation`s victory over Pakistan in 1971 and the birth of Bangladesh, An iconic soldier who never retired - passes away into eternity, and the Home and Defence Ministry squabble over the warrant of precedence?

What warrant of precedence?

Who other than stodgy government types care what the warrant says?

The custodians of the warrant are supposed to be the crème de la crème,disgusting as that is -

The Ministry of Home Affairs is the nodal ministry that takes decisions on amendments to be made to the list(warrant of precedence) and notifies whether the National Flag will fly at half mast in the event of a dignitary`s death. A proposal for making changes or additions to the list are considered by the 'warrant of precedence committee' that is chaired by the Cabinet Secretary and includes the secretaries of Home, Defence, and External Affairs minitries as its members.

One of the reasons for the poor turnout at the funeral of Field Marshal Sam Manekshaw supposedly, was the confusion about his rank in the warrant of precedence issued by theGovernment of India. It was mentioned that while the three Chiefs had a warrant of precedence, a Field Marshall does not have one, other than when he was in service. Hence the confusion as to what kind of a funeral should be given to him and who should be present at the final farewell. The Government had to take a special decision that Sam Manekshaw should have a state funeral.

It is still not understood though(May be I am psychotic to be expecting such basic etiquettes), as to why The Honorable Chiefs of Staffs of the three forces as well as the Honorable Defence Minister- all found it beneathe their lofty egos or dignity to pay their last respects to the man they can never, ever dream of emulating - let alone come anywhere close to being.

It makes my blood boil. Literally.

We Indians have yet to learn how to honour the Brave.

Ironically, U.S Democratic Presidential candidate Barack Obama has offered his condolences and acknowledged the greatness of a man, which his own country did not deem fit to do

If the legendary Marshal did not straightaway warrant an amazingly respectful state funeral then who really does? And on what credentials? It is disgusting and deeply disturbing to me that the so-called leaders of my country do not have the ability to comprehend, acknowledge and salute genuine worthiness and unprecedented acts of patriotism and bestow all that is due,upon them who have rightly won this honor.

For those who are not familiar with the technicalities, Mind you, a Field Marshal never retires. So alright, it is an honorary distinction, But it is a rank that is for life and it is the superlative military rank, besides of course the President of India, who continues to be the Supreme Commander.

I have of course,never had the priviledge of meeting The Legend. But I do recall the stories I heard from an old retired general back at Mendhar,Poonch. Sam Manekshaw was his contemporary and colleague.

The General fondly recalled a day when Marshal Manekshaw, then the Army Chief in service was to visit Dalhousie. All officers were smartly lined up in their best uniforms, shining stars, gleaming boots, chests out, stomachs in, waiting for the Marshal to turn up and get to greet him one by one( in the Army terminology, it is called an introduction parade).

Soon the gleaming black staff car swooped in, Regimental Police snapped to attention, the ever smiling Marshal (then a full General), with his ever twinkling eyes, stepped down, and without a single glance towards the lined up officers made straight for the big mustachioed Karnataka native Regimental Police man.

"Kaisa Hai?" his voice boomed.

"Theek hai? Family Kaisa Hai?" he continued as he bent inside the car and pulled out a bottle of water,handing it down to the Havaldar.

“Kitni garmi hai bhai”, said the Marshal, knowing fully well the protocol(read drama/drill) that must have been followed for hours in the blazing sun, before his arrival.

After chatting for a good two minutes with the Havaldar (sergeant), He walked across the parade of men all standing in a corner to run errands at the Commanding Officer`s beck and call(Like fetch water or tea) and spent a good 15 minutes chatting up with them, asking them about their lives in the unit and if the Unit and its Officers were treating them well. Finally Sam made his way back to warmly greet the officers. However, in those 15 minutes he sent out a powerful message, reminding the officers of what they had read on their way to becoming officers at Chetwode Hall in the Indian Military Academy at Dehradun.

'The safety, honour & welfare of your country comes first, always & every time.
The honour, welfare & comfort of the men you command come next.
Your own ease, comfort & safety come last, always & every time.
.'

The Army is peppered with anecdotes of the Marshal, his style, his verve, his panache, his guts, his glory, his personality, his aura, his warmth. Surely, we could have bid him a better goodbye.

An old military saying goes 'Old soldiers never die, they just fade away.'

And whether the top bosses controlling the reigns of our 'great' nation like to agree or not, Field Marshal Sam Manekshaw won't fade away in a hurry.